Pattaya One News
Home » How Porn can help your business
Digital Marketing Expats Health and wellness International News

How Porn can help your business

porn plumber pattayaone

Few who know the internet will deny the effect Porn has had on the industry. But how can you use their knowledge of digital marketing to make your business website work more effectively for you.

Dress up and present it brazenly

Porn is as direct as it can be, and there is a good reason for that, it knows you don’t have the staying power, porn is so effective in giving you what you desire. Even the domain names leave you with little doubt about what you are about to see.

Does your business website domain name tell people immediately what they are going to get?

Like these unfortunate names: whorespresents.com and penisland.net (They are not porn sites!)

Content management systems like Word Press and Google get it on, they know each other like 2 top performers and they know where to find all your website erogenous zones. If you use an SEO plug in it will automatically lubricate Google’s bot and present nicely all the meta-titles and meta-key phrases telling Google what your site is all about, making it easier for search engines to present you to their audience!

Categorise what you do

Go Deeper

With categories Word Press are making it easier for search engines to see your website as a knowledge base.

With porn the categories are a major part of how they are so easy to find what you are looking for because each person’s desire is very unique to them.

For the ladies it may be all about the place and the atmosphere the foreplay, whereas for men it is probably more about colours, clothing, and anatomical characteristics, all of which deserve their own category and sub category and sub-sub category. Porn delves deep into categories and uses tags to their real advantage there are so many ways to say the same phrase in different countries, so they combine them all.

If your website is not utilising the categories and tags section of your website and filling in the short and large category descriptions and looking online to see how people search for your particular products and services then you are leaving the money shot on the table!

Google calls this ‘schema,’ meaning the more good associated synonyms you use on your website the better it trusts you to be an authority on your subject and trust leads to next base…rankings!

If you are a skin Clinic for example you should have dozens of terms you can use for skin like ‘derma’ and all the skin complaints, each one of these categories when used should have a meta-title and descriptions on your site.

Remember Google wants to be a library of information not a shopping mall, and the sites with more information, well in theory, will rank higher than a pure sales website

Learn to sexy talk with Google

Google is a robot, you knew that right? It will be years before it can look at an image and tell you what it is about, so for now Google wants you to tell it in descriptive words what the picture is showing.

Porn loves this bit they describe in ultra-graphic detailed wording to search engines what each image is because it knows Google will just lap it up and this all helps with your rankings.

If your website has a picture of a cement mixer, whilst you might find it inane to do so; Google will reward you by going to the alt tag and describing that wonderful cement mixed spilling its glorious load and making houses and floors in buildings. If you have many images you had better get started!

Picture this big boy!

Any future relationships?

As far back as 1896, a film called Le Coucher de la Mariée showed a woman performing a striptease. This is generally considered the first pornographic film in existence. The high demand for this early masterpiece led the French filmmakers to realize that people would pay top dollar to see women get naked on screen. Thus, the genre of pornography was born.

Today many are thinking how virtually reality headsets and Japanese milking machines as they are called will kill human procreation. However a recent clip by Dara O Briain the Mock the week presenter proved how difficult that premise is:

Is your website and business looking to the future?  Are you married to one particular concept that may be running its natural cause?  My, look how far we come and please remember porn only gives you an unrealistic expectation about how fast a plumber can turn up to fix your boiler!

The Red Light is on outside AX Media’s office our Pillow talk is legendary we can help you get your website purring and your clients loins grinding to meet you Contact us now

Get in touch with our news team by emailing us at [email protected]

Related posts

Pattaya One New Thailand, your go-to source for global and local news, alongside effective business advertising opportunities, tailored to the vibrant city of Pattaya.
Translate »