McDonald’s Counter: A man has appeared in court after he whipped down his trousers, jumped on a McDonald’s and started to ‘helicopter’ his penis, while ‘heavily fuelled by alcohol’, obviously.
Edinburgh Sheriff Court heard that at around 5am on 22 July this year, 29-year-old Ryan Dolan from Musselburgh popped into the South St Andrew’s Street branch of the fast-food chain, where he started by pretending to serve customers before pulling his trousers down and doing the weird dance while shocked customers and staff looked on.
Nicole Lavelle, fiscal depute, told the court: “Out of the blue he took his trousers and pants off, showing his penis and testicles and thereafter was dancing with his trousers down”.
After carrying out he bizarre routine, he pulled up his kecks, but then jumped down on the staff side of the counter, the Edinburgh Evening News.
Understandably, Dolan was asked by staff to leave, but he didn’t pay attention to their request and instead got his genitals out again.
Lavelle added: “He grabbed his penis and started to play with it pretending to serve customers and started dancing again, carrying out helicopter-like moves with his penis”.
After a ‘few minutes’, he pulled his trousers back up and left.
Dolan’s behaviour was described as Lavelle as ‘boisterous acts, heavily fuelled by alcohol’.
Dolan was arrested after cops reviewed CCTV footage. He pleaded guilty to committing acts of public indecency.
The court heard that Dolan had ‘very little recollection’ of the incident. But Sheriff McCormark noted that he had two previous convictions for ‘similar offences’ – the mind boggles.
He added that he would have fined Donlan £750, but took into account his guilty plea and reduced the amount to £500, which he will pay back at the rate of £100 a month. Let’s hope next time he fancies a Big Mac at 5am he manages to keep his trousers on, eh?
Mr Dolan isn’t the only guy who thinks getting his dick out is a good idea while drunk and in public.
Earlier this year, a man called John Henson, from Redcar, found himself hauled up in front of a judge after he whacked his penis against the door of a car containing two women, before doing a dump on the pavement. To add an even more bizarre twist to this already fucking odd story the court heard that while all of this was going on, the two women looked on while eating chips.
The 44-year-old was called a ‘dirty bastard’ by one of the women, who then threw some chips at him, but undeterred he then squatted down and had a shit.
Henson was sentenced to an 18 month community order with six months supervision, sent to rehab for 25 days and ordered to pay the victims £100 compensation.
