Bar girl fails to measure up
A young woman is in shock after discovering her Japanese husband secretly married another woman.
Miw, as she is known in the media, said her husband’s duplicity came to light only after a wedding organiser posted images from his second wedding, to a woman in Isan known as Nong B. A friend of her older brother recognised the groom in the picture and asked him when the pair had broken up.
Miw, who spoke on TV last week about the drama, said she and her husband, Song, had grown estranged since his return from a three-month business trip to Japan in June.
He spent 14 days in quarantine then declared he wanted to downgrade their relationship to that of mere partners. The pair met in 2017 when Miw was working as a bar girl in soi Thaniya in Silom, and married two years later.
“He said he wanted a ‘hot heart’ (more excitement). I asked if he was mad and we had a big argument. I couldn’t accept it, as I married him because we wanted a family,” Miw said.
“I cut off all contact. When he was released from quarantine he asked if we could meet to talk. I took off his ring and gave it back to him, and he gave me his.
“He asked me to believe him, said he’d landed some huge contract, and needed time to be alone. He asked to stay at a hotel, but would send me my upkeep as he did before,” she said.
Miw said the two had been chatting for a month when Song asked her to stop working at the bar and offered to pay her rent and upkeep. She said Song would work long hours, often going without sleep as he tracked share prices from a computer at their condo.
“Once he was too tired to carry on and asked me to watch the share price. If it went above a certain level I was to tell him,” she said.
Miw was unsure what he did but said she had visited his business, met his mother in Japan, and met his work friends. Three of his friends turned up after their marriage ceremony, held at a city hotel. However, Song did not invite his family to the event, while she invited almost 100 guests, she said.
“He hadn’t told his mother as late as one week before, and when he did, said his mother was too busy to come as a relative was sick,” she said.
He was always on the secretive side, objecting when she asked to check his phone, and once hiving off to stay at a hotel for three days as he claimed he needed time alone.
“While we were together he asked me not to post any pictures on social media, as he was a businessman and said it could affect his image,” she said.
“Even after he downgraded our relationship, we stayed in touch. He would come and go from the condo to collect stuff, or we would meet for a meal.
“I teased him, asking if he had anyone new, he said no, if he had he’d bring the pictures to show me,” she said.
Asked about their wedding, Miw said he agreed with her mother to pay a 1 million baht bridal price, but then took it back on loan. He has been slowly paying it back and has so far sent her mother 500,000 baht. The pair also bought gold on their credit card to show on their wedding day, only to sell it again later.
Miw said she discovered Song had remarried on Jan 2, and suspects he met Nong B after he came out of quarantine.
He married Nong B at her home in Isan, and once again his family appears to be absent. Posting the images, the wedding organisers boasted of how they transformed a simple home into the setting of a lavish if intimate wedding.
Miw’s older brother, Moss, the first to find out about the secret marriage, said a friend made contact after seeing the wedding images. “My friend asked if this was my brother-in-law and if he and my sister had split up? I said no, they haven’t split up,” he said.
Miw said she was stunned by the images, as she and Song were talking as recently as late December.
“I sent him the wedding images and asked why he had told me to wait for him when he had found someone else.
“Nong B herself called and asked how long we had been married, and whether we had any kids…then said that’s all she wanted to know,” she said.
Miw said she married Song because one day she hoped to start a family. “I was once pregnant with him for seven weeks, but I miscarried.
“When I was pregnant we talked about registering our marriage, but he was always too busy. After I lost the child I was too sad and forgot about it,” she said.
When Song made contact, she confronted him about his shoddy conduct. “He said he loved Nong B, said wanted to be with her. He said he felt better with her than he did with me,” she said in tears.
Miw has now severed their union. She admitted she still loved him though noticed he had started sending her less support. “At the outset he sent 40,000 baht a month, and later cut that to 30,000 baht/m. Last month he sent two payments of 5,000 baht each.”
Producers of the TV show on which she appeared spoke to Song, who said he didn’t want to comment publicly. However, he said if Miw wanted to quit, it was up to her, because he had taken care of her as best he could.
Miw says he did look after her well, but she is sad he went and married someone else without telling her.
Meanwhile, celebrity lawyer Nitithorn “James” Kaewto, who also appeared on the show, says Miw is entitled to a half-share of anything they earned together since they were married in 2017. “He gave her an engagement ring which is a promise they will register their marriage…he broke his promise.
“She can claim she has suffered damages to her reputation when he married someone else, claim the cost of wedding, and for loss of opportunity,” he said. Miw said she hadn’t thought of taking legal action, but would like him to say sorry to her parents.